I can’t focus today. I know I should be working – making phone calls, researching jobs, trying to get interviews and job shadows scheduled – but I can’t concentrate. I feel sick to my stomach, my bowels are hot with agitation, my joints scream in pain even as I write this sentence.
My anxiety is doubling down on my survival instinct. Surviving what? I have no correct, final answer.
Maybe I’m worried because I was exposed to COVID last week and I haven’t gotten a COVID Booster yet this year? Sore throat, chills, and diarrhea are all symptoms of “the VID”.
Bitterness fills me at the prospect of getting boosters in perpetuity.
I could be struggling because I had a (pretty) good weekend – D&D with my friends, For All Mankind on Apple TV with my better half, Reservoir Dogs with my family, and homemade turkey nachos with real cheese for Sunday dinner.
I think the technical term is social hangover, but I would need to consult the Urban Dictionary to ensure proper usage.
Maybe I’m struggling with the dystopian reality we live in – the Clockwork Orange meets Handmaid’s Tale meets Hunger Games hellscape of ugliness our world has become in my (short) lifetime. I hate ultra-competitive online games – they bring out the worst in people – or maybe it’s the always on world we live in?
Is one type of ugliness more ugly than another when it’s online versus news networks?
I argue our species is becoming an endless stream of hot mic moments brought to you by social media, so called news outlets, and the Gotcha Mafia.
Some days I can’t deal with it, and today happens to be one of those days, and I’m not sure how to get through it. Some days the ugliness in our society, our world, wins, and there is nothing to do but retreat, regroup, and try again tomorrow.
Tomorrow is the key, the only thing that matters, and today, tomorrow has to be enough.
Stay safe, Everyone.
Uncommon Karma 